Oh Aisy Girl,

We eat....
Chicken and sausage one pot wonders

Another quick, easy and very yummy one pot wonder to share. This is a little spicy, but you can tone it down by choosing mild sausage.





1 yellow onion diced
2 chicken breast cut into cubes
Hot johnsonville sausage (about 3 links)
Minced garlic
Salt and pepper
Cajun seasoning
Block of frozen chopped spinach(cooked according to directions)
Bag of brown rice (cooked according to directions)
Mozzarella cheese
Parmesan cheese


Cook onions in a skillet with a little bit of oil. Add the chicken(seasoned with salt pepper and Cajun seasoning) and sausage and Cook until brown. Once browned added a bit of garlic and stir. By now there should be some good flavor/juice in the skillet. Add your cooked rice and spinach. Salt and pepper like crazy! You can add in some chicken broth if it isn't very moist. Let the flavors meld together and then add a handful of mozzarella and parm cheese.

Dinner is served!
I got the "it was awesome" from James and there were no leftovers. So I assume it was good.

We eat...
Meatloaf

Meatloaf is the bomb. It is also my speciality. I pretty much always wing it and use different ingredients. Basically whatever I have. That's why meatloaf is awesome. You can use up whatever ingredients you have.

Meatloaf never looks very pretty, but I promise it tastes amazing.
Awful phone pictures do it no justice either.




Today my ingredients goes as follows.

1 pound 90% ground beef
2 eggs
1/3 loaf of French bread
1 yellow onion
Leftover salad mix with carrots and all
Leftover bell peppers
Tomato
Worcester sauce
A1 sauce
Ketchup
Bbq sauce
Salt
Pepper
Montreal steak seasoning
Chunks of cheddar cheese

I put all the veggies, onion and tomato in a blender and made a paste with it.
Put everything in a bowl (totally just eyeballed the sauces and spices) and mix well.

Put in a pan and cover with sauce(which ever one) and bake at 425 for about an hour.
Serve with mash potatoes and broccoli.

I have worn eyelashes daily for over 9 years now! I always hated my lashes and managed to pull a bunch of them out on accident with a mishap with an eyelash curler. I actually started wearing eyelashes when I was in 8th grade and I have been hooked ever since. The way they change my face is so dramatic I couldn't imagine life without them. You may think that makes me high maintenance but honestly, i have done it so long, it takes me just minutes to do and they stay on all day... And a lot of time all night and all day the next day... Without reapplying glue. Putting on eyelashes is easier for me than trying to make mascara look appropriate on my sparse little nubby lashes.

Over the years I have perfected my craft and found the styles that suit me and my face. I get asked almost daily if you eyelashes are real, what mascara do you use, and an unbelievable amount of compliments. One thing I also hear is, I can never get mine to look like that. Or mine fall off. Or... Would you show me how!?

So here is a little information on my eyelashes!

I have changed brands a lot over the years. When I find something I like, I stick with it. I loved the Sephora Brand strip lashes, Flair. But over time I noticed they were not holding up very long and I was wasting money. I switched to the Kardashian brand, Khroma. A great find and great quality... But they always were sold out and I could never buy them online. The past few years I have been stuck on Revlon brand. They were a great price and the glue that Revlon sold changed the game for me. My trick was I stacked the lashes.. Wearing two pairs at once on top of one another. Revlon brand practically never broke down and were easy to clean, making them a great choice. Plus I was able to buy them at Walmart! Win. Well in the past 6 months the brand has practically vanished, at least for the style I was so obsessed with. I emailed Revlon to ask what's up, and no reply. Walmart quit stocking them and I was lost again.

I've tried many eyelashes. I am very particular and like a sort of spiky style. All the drugstore brands were crap. They fell apart after one use and didn't look nearly as good. So I fell back on my old time favorite, Sephora, to see if in the years time their craftsmanship had improved.

As I said before I am a huge fan of Revlon glue, however I can't find it anymore. I actually started using Duo latex strip adhesive. It's a new glue that goes on blue and dries clear. Fun fact: Sephora was using this glue way before Duo got ahold of it. So now it is my go to, or the tiny bottle of glue that comes with the Sephora lashes. I recommend this glue only.. If you want your eyelashes to hold up all day and night. (And the next day if you want) Swimming... Roller coasters... Ocean kayaking. It holds. I've tried it. Just don't jump off of 30foot waterfalls. That's the one time it didn't hold haha.

Anyways...






So I went out on a whim and bought a new brand Sephora has crafted. I have always loved the flair style, but fierce was calling my name and man I'm glad it did. They are great. Thick.. And new users may feel like they are a little heavy.. But easy to get used to and stay on well.

Okay.. Now for the applying.



I always use a moisturizer before doing anything. I got this great Osea moisturizer in my Fabfitfun summer box and I am hooked. The scent is light and refreshing and the moisturizer makes my skin so soft. I typically take some of the moisturizer and mix it with my foundation with spf30 and I'm good to go. I switch up foundation a lot, and during the summer I don't typically wear any foundations. I am really liking this Make Up For Ever brand right now for special occasions.

Then I hit my problem areas and under my eyes and brows with a concealer (hide those dark circles). After that I line my bottom lash and inner corner of my eye with a highlighter crayon. ipsy sent me this great brand, Trestique. It keeps my eyes bright all day! I also hit the curve in my brow and for special occasions use it when contouring.


Then I curl my eyelashes. This helps keep the fake lashes standing up. Then eyeshadow. I do all this first so that the eyeshadow doesn't flake onto the lashes.
This Revlon photo ready eye art is great for a shimmery under tone. It goes on like paint. The glitter portion doesn't flake off either. It dries like paint and peels off kinda like paint.

I then add some color with a new favorite eyeshadow palette, by Tarte. (Received this in my PopSugar box). I start with light colors on the inside and radiate to a dark tone. Hitting my bottom lash line with the colors as well.

Then add some mascara. Totally up to you. I just brush one coat on my top lashes to help disguise them. And fix my bottom lashes the way I want. Right now I am liking Clinique but smash box does a pretty good mascara too (thanks ipsy!)

Now for the fun.
I take the eyelashes out and line the strip with glue. I decent amount to cover the strip. I let it dry until it gets tacky. If you put it on immediately it won't stick. I bend the eyelashes and make them malleable then then starting from the inner corner, lay them directly on top of my own lashes. While drying I mess with them a bit to get them as close to my own lashes as possible. Afterwards I swipe on a top thin layer of glue. Just as a binder.

One that is all dry I take this cream eyeliner from maybelline and fill in eyeliner into my lash line and tight line my upper lid. Doing this makes the lashes flow together and not look as fake.

To finish my look I fill in my eyebrows with a pencil. Brush on some Bronzer on my cheek bones. Ipsy sent me Hikari and I am obsessed. It is also a great eyeshadow color.

I am not a huge person on lip color. But I have been playing around with a pale pink pencil and some gloss over top.


Vaaaa voom.

Maybe one day I'll do a video tutorial. I am always trying new stuff so who knows.

Weight has forever been a hard topic for me. I have struggled with self esteem and self image since I was a child. I honestly think it started when I was in dance. The dance class I was in consisted of all extremely tiny girls whose parents were extremely well off. Not that there is anything wrong with that, however I realized very quickly that I was different than them. I let myself think that because they were skinnier than me, they were better than me. This followed me into soccer as well. I never could assess my full potential because I didn't believe in my ability. I was never obese, overweight yes, until middle school when I dropped the weight, started dressing for my body and paid attention  to my looks rather than hiding from them.

I have carried at "fat girl" stigma of my self ever since. I have never thought I was skinny. Never. And if I am being honest, I don't think I ever will.  Now, don't take that wrong. I base beauty on way more than weight. I think a strong mind and quick quit is a million times sexier than the number you see on the scale. Fat is not ugly. It is the persona that "fat" in my mind carries with me that is ugly. In American society, the worst thing you can be is fat. And that is pathetic, but it is very real. Want to know discrimination that does not matter your skin color or ethnicity... try weight. If you don't believe me, lose 20 pounds and see the attention that gives you. The constant "you look great" "what are you doing to look so good" and even "damn girl"... all compliments that low ball the simple fact that losing weight is the best thing you can do for your outside image. I am guilty of it myself, complimenting others for a drop in the numbers on a scale. It is an invisible kind of discrimination, that is so bright it is blinding. That's why weightless is one of the biggest marketing industries in the world.
Anyways...

I do think I am beautiful. I am smart and driven. And I'm a good mom, caring and empathetic. But I would be lying if I said I didn't feel more beautiful when my pants button.


High school brought on a whole new level of self esteem issues for me. I used to be so nervous to eat in front of people because I didn't want them to judge me. I never once bought lunch in high school. Never. That may sound dumb, but it was very real. On my trip to Europe for three weeks, I was not only sick from the different foods... But I also rarely ate anything because of my insecurity. My weight bothered me so much that my mood truly was affected by how I felt when I looked in the full length mirror. Theatre and the stage helped me cope. I could be someone different on stage. I had talent and ability, to make others think, laugh, cry.... that weight was not the overwhelming elephant in the room anymore. Sounds like an oxymoron, but it makes since when you have been on stage.

 I was a still a constant up and down with weight.














Returning from Europe at about 115 pounds, I hadn't been that small since before I could remember. That weight came back and the yo-yo diets started. What I didn't know then was that I was setting myself up for the ultimate failure of disordered eating.

Paris, after three weeks of barely eating.

This followed me into college where I took a turn for the worse, dropping 20 pounds in a month by starving myself. I worked out two times a day, obsessively. So focused on my body and how good being thin felt. Well that can only last so long before your energy plummets, hands and feet hurt from poor circulation, sleep is all you want, headaches, stomach pain .... And the doctor was very worried. My parents were too. I was happy, but I knew I was killing myself. I could feel it.

So I got help. The weight crept back, and I struggled even more. I couldn't focus on anything other than when the next workout would come and why I should skip the next meal. I took extreme measures to make myself happy. I regret it now, wish so badly I could honestly appreciate the beauty that I held outside of the way my body was shaped.

After my first year of college.

Football season, dropping weight fast.

A month before pregnancy.

5 Weeks Pregnant

When I got pregnant I was in the slow progress of loving my body again. Losing weight slowly. Loving myself again. The pregnancy threw me for a loop. Not only was I sick but the only foods I wanted were the things I had deprived myself of ever having. Pizza, burgers... Ice cream. Working out was a negative. I was miserable... And getting fatter by the second.


I let my weight bother me so bad that I never even bothered with maternity photos. I was so embarrassed by the scale I refused to look at the doctors office. I accidentally looked at one of my last visits and I was at 183.


183... And still going. I cried.
And then I remembered just months before how I saw the numbers on the scale at the doctors office (pre-pregnancy) at 141 and how I cried then. I was dumb then.


I died inside. I am only 5 foot 1. So short in the scheme of things. I didn't know what I was weighing before I got pregnant but I figure about 135-140. So I gained nearly 50 pounds.

Once Aislynn was born I was on a high I can't hardly describe. Something so amazing, as a mixture of having my baby in my arms and finally not being pregnant anymore. Such a relief ran over me. I breastfed for as long as I could, 3 months, and afterwards I didn't even feel bad about how I looked. I just wasn't pregnant anymore and that was all I cared about.

One thing had changed though, the disordered eating I had known for so many years was gone. I started doing small workouts, tried a few cleanses. Even did Advocare, which I ended up gaining 4 pounds on. I couldn't tell you why. The scale was sitting at 160. My short stature is not meant to be that heavy. I loved my body for having carried my daughter in it, but I wanted to feel like me again.

Breastfeeding helped keep the weight down at first.

I was sucking it in too. Pre-Advocare.

Post Advocare = No change

A month After Advocare.

2 months post-Advocare

3 months out.

4 Months.

5 Months. I haven't been able to fit into these jeans since early college.

Fast Forward:

The disordered eating is gone, and my happiness is back. Go figure, if I had known that is what it would have took I would have tried that years go.

5 months later, with healthy habits, moderate exercise and the love of an incredible little child who looks up to me and needs me no matter how I feel about myself or what I see in the mirror...
I'm sitting at a satisfying 134. The number doesn't define me though

It's how I feel. I don't stress over eating. I don't want to break down every time I put on a pair of shorts. I am happy. I am not so obsessed with my weight that I can't enjoy my daughter. When we go to the beach I play with her in the water and in the sand and don't stress over the "belly role". I can't imagine pushing my stress and insecurities on my child, inadvertently or otherwise. She deserves to feel beautiful and have a mother who fosters that beauty, both in her life and my own.

You define your own beauty. And the most beautiful thing in the world is how your children remember you and that beauty you hold on the inside and out for them.

We eat...
Spicy Fried Pork Chops.


Another easy meal down! I had these in the freezer and thawed them out over night. Including all the sides, I was able to finish this whole meal while Aislynn ate (played with) her dinner.




4 boneless pork chops
2 cups Flour
Salt and pepper
Canola oil
2 tablespoons Spicy Montreal seasoning
Buttermilk

In a dish mix together flour, salt, pepper and spicy Montreal seasoning. Dip pork chops in butter milk then into the flour mixture. In a skillet heat up the oil. Once hot, cook pork chops until no longer pink in the center.



We served this with buffalo cauliflower. It's a new flavorful creation by Birdseye and I am hooked. Not too spicy.



Homemade mashed potatoes. Corn on the cob. Mac and cheese. And gravy (which may have turned out way too thick).

Also... I have stolen my sweet friends garlic bread recipe and I'm hooked.
Take any bread and slather on some melted butter, garlic and salt. Top with cheese and Italian seasoning. In the oven at 350 until cheese is bubbly. Boom. Perfection.


Aisy may have been a complete mess after the fact, so I hosed her off on the porch. 😂✌🏻️



Best,

Abagail